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Blue Gaurdian 2004, Poloroid photo by: Connor Bailey Posted by Picasa

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Cynical response to modern-day irritants

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Below are various things that annoy the bejaysus out of me about living in the Modern Age. Complex automated Voice Mail trees "..press 9 to talk about this, press 2...." None of which "say dial pound to talk to a human or manage a transaction too complex for a machine." Also, overly long Voice Mail extensions and option. Like: “just call 1-877-510-2147, Dial Option 1, then Option 6 then extension 914326. (huh?) Grocery Store “Membership Cards,” such as the Slaveway Club Card, which tracks your purchasing habits and pattern-matches them to your zip code. Additionally, this requires extra steps in the transaction, digging out the stupid card and/or having to voice your phone number in public. Of course, you can give them bogus information, but that is a company forcing you into dishonesty. Just for the hell of it, I signed a card profile up using the QFC Corporate address so they can get their own junk mail. Not using one of these cards gives you a penalty in terms of...
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Visit to local enigma

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OK, how is this for geeky? My son and I were on Broadway having lunch at Rom Mai Thai, one of our favorite restaurants. They have a rock'n green curry and a good attitude towards child patrons, as all smart businesses should. After, we started to wander north and peeked in the window of the "Seattle Museum of the Mysteries." Located at 623 Broadway Avenue East, a formally somewhat creepy place, that I was still curious about and would like to now demystify. The rather nice post card they gave me says it features "Exhibits, Library, Cultural Center, UFO History, Ghosts and Northwest Mysteries." They also gave me a tri-fold flier from "NUFORC" (I've never seen such a dorky acryonym in my life) the National UFO Reporting Center. (more info at: www.UFOcenter.com ) I have been and seen many a parent with children in tow look down the dank, dark stairwell next to the sign, and the ill-favored (creepy/rubbery) larger than life troll mascot that sits on th...
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Gallery 1412

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June 11th, of Evergreen alum and Kaos jazz buff Fred Kellog invited me to our annual live jazz event. All I knew was that I was invited to the "Free Jazz Festival." I thought it would be fun to get dressed up, bring a girlfriend and go yak it up with a bunch of lively jazz buffs. We went to a tiny art venue called Gallery 1412 , off of 18th and Union, in the same obscure row of a 2-chair barbarshop and a "christian youth ministry." Located at: Gallery 1412 1412 18th Ave Seattle, WA 206.322.1533. My preconcieved idea on this one was way off. My girlfriend Beth and I drove over there, puzzled to find a tiny shop-space with a paper sign sort of haphazardly pasted over another sign. It looked like it was made out of that reverse side of a brown, paper grocery store bag. There was a gated door that was locked, the windows where covered. There was one other guy standing there waiting to get it. It was a cold, windy night, and we were underdressed. Finally, someone opened...
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